“The Dinosaur Brain Goes to School”

When School Feels Unsafe: Anxiety and the Dinosaur Brain 🦖

If you’ve been following along on my blog, you might remember my last post about our “dinosaur brain” — that ancient part of the brain that kicks into fight, flight, freeze, or fawn when we sense danger. It’s the part of us that tries to protect us, even when the “danger” isn’t a saber‑toothed tiger, but something like walking into math class, facing a crowded hallway, or hearing that we have to do a group project (van der Kolk, 2014).

For many middle school and high school students, school can feel like a constant trigger for that dinosaur brain. The environment, the expectations, the social pressures — all of it can send their nervous systems into overdrive. And when that happens, learning, and even functioning, becomes incredibly difficult (Public Health Agency of Canada, 2022).

So, let’s talk about school anxiety — 💬

School Days 🍎🚌

It’s been a couple months since the new school year kicked off, and everyone’s gotten back into the routine of things — or have they?

For a lot of kids, especially in middle school and high school, their days navigating school become interspersed with anxiety, social pressure, and the endless juggling act of expectations. 🤹‍♀️And for students who have such struggles as ADHD, autism, learning disabilities, trauma, and/or physical limitations/chronic pain — the school year can feel less like a fresh start and more like climbing a mountain in roller skates. 🛼It's a mismatch between a student’s needs and the environment they’re expected to navigate. Every step takes extra effort, and slipping feels inevitable (Future Skills Centre, 2025).

School Isn’t Built for Every Brain 🧠

I’d love to say that schools today are inclusive, flexible, and ready to meet the needs of every learner. However, after supporting three kids through the system and working with countless families in my counselling practice — I can tell you that it’s not that simple. As a therapist, I see the same story playing out in my office every single week. Young people — bright, creative, funny, thoughtful, amazing students — coming in weighed down by school-related anxiety. Not just “I forgot my homework” stress, but deep, body-level overwhelm (Craig et al., 2022).T

They tell me things like:

“I can’t make myself go into the building.”

"I feel stupid compared to everyone else.”

“I’m always in trouble.”

“I try my best, but it’s never enough.”

“No one understands how hard it is for me.”

“They can’t see my pain so they don’t believe me.”

“My body reacts in a way that doesn’t make sense and I can’t get to class.”

“There are too many people. It’s too loud. It’s too bright.”

“No one seems to understand that I just don’t get it.”

And it’s not just one kind of school, either. I’ve worked with students from both large and small schools, public schools, schools with poor reputations, fine‑art schools, independent schools, faith‑based schools and even online schools. The theme is the same — our education system still assumes one size fits all. And when you don’t fit that size? You struggle, you fight a silent battle and you try to fit into a system that isn’t made for you. 💔

I know for a fact that teachers and support staff go above and beyond to support their students, often dipping into their own time and pockets to do so. Teachers care deeply, resource teams work hard, and EAs are absolute heroes but the system isn’t built for kids who learn, move, or process the world differently. And that struggle comes at a cost—

emotionally, mentally, and even physically.

Why School Feels So Hard for So Many Kids 📚

When we talk about school anxiety or school refusal, there are so many layers. School anxiety isn’t just “I don’t want to go.” or "I'm having a hard time.". And let’s be clear: school refusal or chronic absence is NOT “laziness” or “parenting gone wrong.” It’s often kids’ best attempt to cope with overwhelming anxiety or trauma or other mental health concerns. For youth living with depression, trauma, or panic disorders (which, in Canada, have climbed post‑pandemic), daily attendance can feel impossible — not for lack of will, but for lack of safety, hope, or connection (Statistics Canada, 2024).

Canadian school mental health data show that nearly 1 in 5 youth will grapple with a mental disorder before age 18, and these rates are notably higher for marginalized groups and neurodivergent students (Public Health Agency of Canada, 2022).

Some of the school anxiety related concerns I see all the time often revolve around one or more of the following:

• Perfectionism 🎯

• Fear of failure 😨

• Unresolved trauma 💔

• Mental health concerns like depression, panic attacks and ADHD 🧠

• Learning disabilities or differences 📘

• Sensory overload (crowded hallways, buzzing lights, noisy cafeterias) 🔊

• Bullying or social exclusion 🚫

• Poor peer relationships or lack of close friendships or choosing the “wrong friends” 😕

• Family stress, transitions or lack of family support 🏠

• Low confidence and lack of coping strategies 🌱

• Behavioural challenges that get misunderstood as “defiance” ⚠️

• Difficulty handling change or feeling out of control 🔁

  
  

When you combine all that with a nervous system that’s constantly scanning for danger (that dinosaur brain again!), school becomes less of a learning environment and more of a survival zone (van der Kolk, 2014). 🦖

And for some students, it’s not about what is happening at school — it’s about how their body is responding to it.

Enter the Dinosaur Brain 🦖

If you’ve read my earlier blog about the “Dinosaur Brain,” you know where I’m headed. The dinosaur brain—our survival brain—is the part that jumps into action when we feel unsafe or overwhelmed. It’s about survival and it is powerful, and it doesn’t care if the “threat” is a hungry predator or an upcoming math test or uncomfortable social situation.

When a student’s brain senses “danger”, it shifts into one of four trauma responses: fight, flight, freeze, or fawn.

• Fight: The student who lashes out when feeling cornered—argues, gets “defiant.” 😡

• Flight: The one who skips class or hides in the bathroom or refuses to attend school at all. 🏃‍♂️

• Freeze: The kid who shuts down, stares blankly at the board, and gets labeled as “not trying.” ❄️

• Fawn: The people‑pleaser who bends over backwards to please teachers or friends, terrified of letting anyone down. 🤝

  
  

These are not bad kids. These are their survival responses. Their brains are trying to protect them from perceived threat—whether it be an exam, a noisy classroom, or a peer’s judgmental glance.

And here’s the kicker: when a child is in dinosaur‑brain mode, learning anything is going to be extremely difficult. The parts of the brain (what I refer to as “the thinking brain”) needed for reasoning, creativity, and memory go offline. No amount of “focus harder” or “try your best” can override a nervous system in survival mode. Instead this creates a domino effect, stoking anxiety, harming attendance, and lowering achievement for those not built for a school system targeted at an “average student” (Siegel, 2012).

I’ve worked with adults who still carry school trauma from being misunderstood, shamed, or excluded decades ago. The body remembers, the brain protects, even when the conscious mind wants to move on.

Check out the Sunnyhill Hospital website for some great information on school refusal: School refusal & absenteeism behaviour in high school-aged youth💡

Those Amazing Neurodiverse Brains 🦄

As a parent of a wonderful, neurodivergent brain and a therapist working with families from all over British Columbia with neurodiverse family members I have witnessed the challenge school is for those that learn differently. ADHD and Autism brains do not deserve “one size fits all” (Hello Spectrum!!) treatment in schools, or for that matter in the community, in families, in everything. Every family, every individual, every diagnosis, every symptom is going to differ.

If ADHD is part of your family’s life, school can be a daily emotional rollercoaster. ADHD isn’t just about attention — it’s about time management, organization, working memory, emotional regulation, and, yes, anxiety. Canadian research confirms that a substantial proportion of children with ADHD experience clinically significant anxiety, and that comorbidity increases during adolescence (CADDAC; CADDRA). 📈

Why? As the pace of high school accelerates, supports often dwindle. Add in the fact that ADHD makes social nuance, classroom rules, and “wait your turn” expectations extra difficult. When supports are absent, students get labelled as disruptive, lazy, stupid or unmotivated (when often, they’re just overwhelmed or misunderstood).

Medication can be helpful, no doubt, but that alone rarely solves school‑based ADHD anxiety. What works? Wraparound support. Think coordinated interventions that consider executive functioning, learning skills, and social coaching, not just behaviour management. But most students with ADHD don’t even meet criteria for funding and IEPs are built “accommodation lite.” I am yet to witness an ADHD student receiving the in‑depth, ongoing interventions these kids need. Plus, “invisible” disabilities like ADHD or anxiety are often questioned or doubted, leading to additional advocacy (read: anxiety and stress) for parents and more reasons for kids to mask their struggles or withdraw. 😔 (Future Skills Centre, 2025; CADDAC).

Students with Autism often face doubly high school anxiety: both from the unpredictable, noisy, and often socially‑confusing school environment and from repeated experiences of exclusion, inflexibility, or public misunderstandings. Rigid schedules or sudden changes can generate panic; and social rejection is both more likely and more painful. Studies and surveillance reports indicate substantial rates of co‑occurring anxiety among autistic youth (Public Health Agency of Canada; AIDE Canada).

Sure, students with autism who have higher needs such as not having language or who showcase behavioural challenges can be “managed” but are they actually receiving the education they deserve or the supports they need at school? There is no way. Especially if you add on to this any type of trauma which I would argue autism often places people in environments and situations that raise the likelihood of traumatic experiences and trauma-linked reactions.

Schools are, by design, loud, unpredictable places — bright fluorescent lights, echoing cafeterias, crowded corridors, perfume wafting from the changerooms. For autistic students or those with sensory processing differences, this is anxiety incarnate. “Masking” to fit in is exhausting and harmful, leading to even higher levels of anxiety.

For students with neurodiverse brains “school avoidance”, difficult behaviours and inability to self‑regulate are often symptoms of the 🦕 dinosaur brain ensuring survival.

Not Lazy, Not Broken: Only Surviving (with Learning Disabilities) 📘

In my years of advocating for my own children with learning disabilities as well as providing school anxiety treatment in my counselling office, I have seen learning disabilities often misdiagnosed or misunderstood. They are also deemed (purposely or not…) as “less than” in importance compared to more visible disabilities or difficult behaviours. Funding is lacking, understanding is hit or miss and the resulting anxiety is debilitating. In addition, misinterpretation of what is going on for students is often viewed as lack of motivation, not anxiety or learning differences. Avoidant coping—skipping class, “forgetting” assignments, acting out—become patterns that are self‑reinforcing. With every avoidance, anxiety grows, and school feels less and less safe. 😞 (LDAC).

The Invisible Struggle: Chronic Illness and Pain in the Classroom ♨️

There’s another group of students who often go unseen — those living with invisible illnesses and chronic pain. Think of conditions like chronic migraines, Crohn’s disease, POTS, Ehlers‑Danlos syndrome, chronic fatigue, or autoimmune disorders. These kids might look “fine” on the outside but are quietly managing pain, fatigue, brain fog, or medication side effects .

Imagine trying to sit through a double block of math while your body is screaming for rest, the pain increases with extended periods of sitting, or worrying about missing another day of class because your pain flared up again. For these students, school anxiety is often tied to unpredictability—never knowing when symptoms will hit, or fearing judgment for needing accommodations (SKIP, 2021).

Chronic pain and trauma are deeply connected—both keep the body on edge, scanning for threat. So when I talk about the dinosaur brain, I’m talking about these students, too. Their brains and bodies are in survival mode more often than not. The student might not look “sick,” but their nervous system is under constant stress — and chronic stress amplifies physical pain and fatigue (Taylor & Stanton, 2007).

I’ve had teens in my life and in my practice tell me:

• “My teachers and peers think I’m just skipping, pretending or making excuses.”

• “I can’t concentrate because my body hurts all the time.”

• “Nobody believes me because I don’t look sick.”

• “I don’t measure up to the others expectations but they don’t know the pain I am in.”

• “I don’t know what it would be like to have a pain‑free day at school.”

• “Medical appointments often take me out of school or interfere with my ability to do my homework.” 😢

  
  

It’s heartbreaking. Chronic illness often comes with unpredictable “flare days,” fatigue, and pain that make attendance inconsistent and these students can feel like they’re constantly falling behind. What they need is understanding and flexibility.

That might look like:

• Hybrid or partial‑day attendance options 🧩

• Grace with deadlines and absences, plans to accommodate missed class time for medical appointments 📅

• Ability to get up and move around or change positions such as moving between a standing desk and standard desk↔️

• Easy access to pain management — heat pads, ice bags, braces, cushions and adaptive equipment or fatigue accommodations ♨️

• Quiet, calm spaces to rest during the day 🛋️

• Teachers who check in privately rather than calling them out in front of peers 🤫

• Collaborative planning between families, healthcare providers, and schools 🤝

• Flexibility to not participate in physically draining activities including PE classes, field trips and outdoor education 🏳️

  
  

The Solutions for Kids in Pain (SKIP) is a knowledge mobilization network, based at Dalhousie University and co‑led by Children’s Healthcare Canada.

Check out their Guide to Chronic Pain in Students: AN IN‑SCHOOL RESOURCE (SKIP, 2021).

The Role of Parents and Therapists: Students Ultimate Navigators, Advocates & Cheerleaders 🧭

Here’s my “real talk”: parents, you are not failing if your child is struggling. Our families become case managers, accommodations‑hunters, and unofficial therapists by necessity. Yet, we also bring unique expertise and deep insight into what helps and what triggers our children. Leaning into our roles — as advocates for our children, but also as partners for our schools — is exhausting, time consuming and can also be disheartening, but is vital. 💪 Some days, that might mean slowing down, changing expectations, or taking a break. Other days, it means celebrating tiny wins — getting out of bed, making it halfway to school, or emailing a teacher for help. Those moments count.

Therapists, too, can offer perspective, validation, and skills — but we’re most effective when working with the school and family teams, not as disconnected supports. In my work, the best progress happens when everyone communicates, trusts each other, and recognizes that learning is about so much more than curriculum. If you’re a parent, teacher, or caring adult wrestling with school anxiety in your world, it’s not because you’re doing something wrong. You’re up against a system that isn’t (yet) designed for difference. It’s time for empathy, for all‑year support, and for advocacy that puts the emphasis back on belonging, safety, and the joy of learning.

From one parent, therapist, and relentless advocate to another: You’re not alone, and your kid is more than enough.

Parents and caregivers:

• Build predictable routines at home, but allow flexibility when anxiety spikes.

• Validate, don’t minimize — “I see that this feels really hard for you right now.”

• Teach kids about their nervous system. Let them know their dinosaur brain isn’t bad — it’s protective.

• Use calm grounding tools: deep breathing, sensory fidgets, calm-down corners.

• Advocate with compassion — teachers want to help but may not have all the information.

  
  

  

When Kids Get Stuck

Sometimes, despite everyone’s best efforts, students still get stuck. Maybe they can’t make it into the school building. Maybe mornings are full of tears, headaches, or stomach aches. Maybe attendance meetings feel like another layer of shame.

When that happens, take a pause. Step back from the attendance charts and the pressure of deadlines or expectations and ask yourself:

• What’s my child’s nervous system trying to tell me?

• Where is their dinosaur brain stuck — fight, flight, freeze, or fawn?

• What does safety look like right now?

As a therapist, I often use body-based resourcing tools like safe place imagery, grounding, or Attachment-Focused EMDR resourcing to help students find calm again. These techniques help the dinosaur brain feel safe enough to stand down, so the thinking brain can come back online.

Teachers and School Staff Are Superheroes!!

Teachers are incredible. My children were all blessed with extraordinary teachers and support staff who did the best they could to manage their challenges in the classroom. And I hear from clients and parents again and again of the Superhero’s (School staff) they come in contact with at schools and the difference they make in their learning experience. However, teachers are expected to teach a class of students with wildly different learning profiles, manage complex behaviours, identify mental health needs, differentiate lessons, communicate with parents, and somehow still get through the curriculum. Phew — that is exhausting to just think about!!

Teachers and support staff are always trying to help, often burning themselves out and landing in my office broken by the system they work in. This system asks them to be experts in what they teach but also in learning disabilities, difficult behaviours, trauma, mental health, autism, ADHD, and more, on top of delivering curriculum designed for students who’d excelled without modification. This isn’t sustainable or fair to anyone. 😓And even Superhero’s need a little assistance from their sidekicks. Teachers need to be able to do what they love and what they do best — TEACH! They are not therapists. They are not crisis counsellors. And they shouldn’t have to be.

Systemic Change is the Dream

If we want to truly address school anxiety, school refusal, and the growing number of youth struggling to stay engaged, we need systemic change. That means:

📌 Dedicated funding for in‑school mental health professionals — trauma therapists, youth workers, social workers, psychologists, occupational therapists — in every school with the capacity to work with all students that need support (CIHI, 2025).

✅Therapist led class-time for students to engage in learning about trauma responses, coping skills, emotion regulation and more!

📚 Training for staff in trauma-informed and neurodiverse practices-This needs to be funded training for all school staff in neurodiversity, trauma‑informed practice, and universal design (University of Waterloo; Trauma‑Informed Canada).

⏳ Consistent and timely psychoeducational assessments (without waitlists and the funding challenges many families face).

🧾 Flexible learning options Flexible scheduling and learning options that honour students’ mental health and physical needs.

🤝 Collaborative care teams-Ongoing care team meetings and collaboration between schools, parents, community partners and mental health providers. Every school district or private school board should have a clear process for identifying, supporting, and following up with students experiencing school anxiety or avoidance — not a “let’s wait and see” or “you’re on your own” approach. Teams should include administration, special educators, mental health leads, and, crucially, parent input.

When we don’t address this, the cost isn’t just academic. It’s emotional. It’s relational. It’s years of kids believing they’re “lazy” or “broken” when really, the system just wasn’t built for them. But is there anything we can actually do? Well, kids and teens who struggle in school need to be understood, supported, and given room to learn in ways that understands and even celebrates their brains!

Final Thoughts ✨

What if we started to see school success not as straight A's or perfect attendance, but as a student feeling safe enough to show up as themselves? Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is help a student feel seen, safe, and supported because when the dinosaur brain finally gets the message that it’s safe. That’s when learning—and healing—can truly begin.

That’s the kind of education system I want to see — and the kind of future our kids deserve. And remember: when a student’s dinosaur brain is in overdrive, safety and connection always come before academics. That’s where real learning begins.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on and experiences with school anxiety. Please leave me a comment below! Or if you like this blog post and think it is worth sharing please like and share on your social media pages. ❤️

Resources to check-out

Below are key resources I share with families and educators.

• Anxiety Canada — Resources: https://www.anxietycanada.com/resources/

  
  

• Public Health Agency of Canada — HBSC 2022 / CHSCY findings: https://www.canada.ca/en/public-health/services/publications/healthy-living/health-behaviour-school-aged-children-hbsc-2022.html;

  
  

• CIHI — child and youth mental health trends: https://www.cihi.ca/en/child-and-youth-mental-health/overall-trends-for-child-and-youth-mental-health

  
  

• Solutions for Kids in Pain (SKIP) — Guide to Chronic Pain in Students: https://kidsinpain.ca/wp-content/uploads/2021/08/FINAL-English-Guide-to-Chronic-Pain-in-Students-1.pdf

  
  

• Learning Disabilities Association of Canada (LDAC): https://ldac-acta.ca/

  
  

• CADDAC / CADDRA — ADHD resources (Canadian): https://caddac.ca/

  
  

• University of Waterloo — inclusive teaching: https://uwaterloo.ca/centre-for-teaching-excellence/resources/inclusive-teaching

  
  

• Future Skills Centre — A Neurodivergent Student’s Guide (summary): https://fsc-ccf.ca/

  
  

• Foundry BC: https://foundrybc.ca/

  
  

• Here to Help BC: https://www.heretohelp.bc.ca/

  
  

• AutismBC / UBC ASAP: https://autismbc.ca/; https://asd-ubc.ca/resources/asap-autism-anxiety-resource

  
  

• Anxiety Canada – Educator Resources

  https://www.anxietycanada.com/learn-about-anxiety/anxiety-in-schools/

  
  

• School Mental Health Ontario

  https://smho-smso.ca/

  
  

• Canadian Mental Health Association (CMHA) – School Programs

  https://cmha.ca/programs-and-services/

• Child Mind Institute – Anxiety in the Classroom

  https://childmind.org/article/classroom-anxiety-in-children/

  
  

• National Association of School Psychologists (NASP)

  https://www.nasponline.org/resources-and-publications/resources-and-podcasts/mental-health

  
  

• Understood.org – For Learning & Thinking Differences

  https://www.understood.org/en/articles/anxiety-in-the-classroom

Thanks for reading—

Stephanie Smith

Registered Social Worker and Therapist

Olive Branch Counselling

www.olivebranchcounsellingchwk.com

Sources

Canadian Institute for Health Information. (2025). Overall trends for child and youth mental health. https://www.cihi.ca/en/child-and-youth-mental-health/overall-trends-for-child-and-youth-mental-health

Children’s Healthcare Canada & Solutions for Kids in Pain (SKIP). (2021). Guide to chronic pain in students: An in‑school resource. https://kidsinpain.ca/wp-content/uploads/2021/08/FINAL-English-Guide-to-Chronic-Pain-in-Students-1.pdf

CADDAC (Centre for ADHD Awareness, Canada). (n.d.). https://caddac.ca/

Craig, W., Pickett, W., & others (Eds.). (2022). Health behaviour in school‑aged children (HBSC) 2022 national report: The health of young people in Canada: A focus on mental health. Public Health Agency of Canada. https://www.canada.ca/en/public-health/services/publications/healthy-living/health-behaviour-school-aged-children-hbsc-2022.html

Future Skills Centre. (2025). A neurodivergent student’s guide. https://fsc-ccf.ca/

Levine, P. (2010). In an unspoken voice: How the body releases trauma and restores goodness. North Atlantic Books.

Porges, S. W. (2011). The polyvagal theory: Neurophysiological foundations of emotions, attachment, communication, and self‑regulation. W.W. Norton.

Siegel, D. J. (2012). The developing mind: How relationships and the brain interact to shape who we are (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.

van der Kolk, B. A. (2014). The body keeps the score: Brain, mind, and body in the healing of trauma. Penguin Books.

UBC Anxiety, Stress & Autism Program (ASAP). (n.d.). Autism + Anxiety resource package. https://asd-ubc.ca/resources/asap-autism-anxiety-resource

University of Waterloo, Centre for Teaching Excellence. (n.d.). Inclusive teaching resources. https://uwaterloo.ca/centre-for-teaching-excellence/resources/inclusive-teaching

Anxiety Canada. (n.d.). Anxiety in schools. Anxiety Canada. https://www.anxietycanada.com/learn-about-anxiety/anxiety-in-schools/

Anxiety Canada. (n.d.). My anxiety plan (MAP) for educators. Anxiety Canada. https://www.anxietycanada.com/my-anxiety-plan/educators/

School Mental Health Ontario. (n.d.). Resources for educators. School Mental Health Ontario. https://smho-smso.ca/

Canadian Mental Health Association. (n.d.). Programs and services. Canadian Mental Health Association. https://cmha.ca/programs-and-services/

Child Mind Institute. (2023). Classroom anxiety in children. Child Mind Institute. https://childmind.org/article/classroom-anxiety-in-children/

National Association of School Psychologists. (n.d.). Mental health resources and podcasts. NASP. https://www.nasponline.org/resources-and-publications/resources-and-podcasts/mental-health

Understood.org. (n.d.). Anxiety in the classroom. Understood. https://www.understood.org/en/articles/anxiety-in-the-classroom

MindUP. (n.d.). MindUP for educators. MindUP. https://mindup.org/

Beyond Blue. (n.d.). Anxiety in schools. Beyond Blue. https://www.beyondblue.org.au/

Edutopia. (n.d.). Anxiety. Edutopia. https://www.edutopia.org/topic/anxiety